Parenting is a sacred calling, but let’s be honest—it’s also overwhelming. In the chaos of daily life, we can easily lose focus, distracted by stressors that pull our attention away from our children and our faith. One of the enemy’s greatest tactics is distraction—keeping us so preoccupied with distress or dread that we disengage from the present moment, missing out on the joy and connection God intends for our families.
This post isn’t about guilt. It’s about awareness and encouragement. By recognizing how distress and dread show up in our parenting, we can take intentional steps to refocus on what truly matters.
How Distress and Dread Lead to Distraction in Parenting
Distress: Emotional overwhelm that makes us feel maxed out and unable to cope. It can stem from exhaustion, unmet expectations, financial strain, or even the constant demands of parenting. When we parent from a place of distress, we may:
- React harshly instead of responding with patience.
- Withdraw emotionally, feeling too depleted to engage.
- Feel preoccupied with our own worries, missing our children’s needs.
Dread: A deep sense of fear or unease about what lies ahead, often anticipating something negative happening. It might be the anxiety of an upcoming life change, parenting challenge, or even just the daily struggles that feel relentless. When we parent from a place of dread, we may:
- Avoid interactions or decisions that feel too overwhelming or where you expect bad responses.
- Carry a tense, anxious energy that our children sense.
- Struggle to enjoy the present because we’re bracing for the next challenge.
Distress and dread are negative emotions that can keep parents internally focused or disengaged. Distress is more often a reaction or response to things that have happened or are happening; whereas, dread is typically anticipating something negative in the future.
Biblical Examples of Distress and Dread
The Bible offers wisdom on these emotions through the stories of Naomi and Esther.
Naomi’s Distress: Naomi, in the book of Ruth, faced immense grief and hardship. She lost her husband and sons, leaving her feeling bitter and abandoned. Her distress clouded her perspective, causing her to believe God had turned against her. And yet, through her journey, she found restoration and hope when she returned to God and her homeland.
Esther’s Dread: Esther, a young queen, faced a terrifying reality—she had to risk her life to plead for her people. It was illegal to approach the king uninvited, and the king had a history of rage and impulsivity. She dreaded the moment, but instead of letting fear paralyze her, she sought support through fasting and prayer. She stepped forward in faith, and God provided a way to save her and her people.
How to Combat Distress and Dread in Parenting
- Cry Out to God: Bring your fears, frustrations, and exhaustion before Him. He welcomes our honesty and offers peace in return (Psalm 118:5-8).
- Seek Support: You weren’t meant to do this alone. Talk to a trusted friend, mentor, or counselor and be honest about your feelings.
- Practice Presence: When you notice distress creeping in, pause. Take a deep breath. Ask for God to be with you. Look into your child’s eyes. Remind yourself that this moment matters.
- Reframe Your Thoughts: Instead of dwelling on what could go wrong, ask: What if this turns out better than I expect?
- Engage in Gratitude: List three things you’re grateful for each day. Gratitude shifts our focus from what’s missing to what is present.
- Worship: Sometimes, a simple worship song can reset our hearts and remind us of God’s presence. It can help put things in perspective when we focus on the attributes of God.
Encouragement for When You Feel Distracted
The enemy wants to keep you wrapped up in distress and dread, but God offers peace. When parenting feels overwhelming, remember that God sees you, walks with you, and equips you for this calling.
Psalm 91 assures us that those who trust in the Lord will find refuge in Him. Just as Naomi found restoration and Esther found courage, you, too, can move forward in faith, knowing that God is with you.
Questions to Reflect On:
What situations tend to trigger distress or dread in your life?
How do these emotions affect your ability to be present (available and responsive) with your children?
What is one small step you can take today to manage your emotions and stay engaged?
We can be parents who honestly experience strong negative emotions without letting them consume our focus and distract us from connecting with our children or with the Lord.
If you are experiencing distress or dread related to parenting and would like to find out more about support that is available through Secure Pathways, consider a FREE 15-minute discovery call or consultation.
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**This blog was inspired by the Life Application® Bible, NIV (1991). Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. Wheaton, IL. that listed “Satan’s Plan” as “Doubt, Discouragement, Diversion, Defeat, and Delay” (pg. 13) and was expanded and applied to parenting by this author.