Parenting is one of the most impactful yet challenging roles we take on. It requires patience, wisdom, grace, energy, and perseverance. And a whole lot of faith! Over the past several months, we’ve explored how the enemy seeks to undermine our relationships with both God and our children, using subtle strategies to distort our priorities and weaken our parenting.
I want to encourage you in parenting! I want you to know that you are not alone!
This blog is not meant as a judgment but rather as an opportunity to bring to light the subtle ways the enemy may try to keep us from being the best parents we can be. It’s an invitation to reflect on what may be happening below the surface—things we may not have even realized were influencing our parenting.
The Enemy’s Five Devices
The enemy is cunning. He doesn’t always attack us in obvious ways but often through quiet, consistent distortions of truth. We’ve examined five major strategies that can derail us in our parenting and other areas of life:
- Doubt – Questioning God, His goodness, and our ability as parents.
- Distraction – Losing sight of what truly matters by focusing on lesser things.
- Discontent – Feeling dissatisfied or resentful about our current circumstances.
- Discouragement – Being worn down by disappointment or hopelessness.
- Discounting – Minimizing or disregarding what truly holds value.
These things are not inherently bad—we all experience them from time to time. But when left unchecked, they can sidetrack or even derail our parenting. Each of us likely struggles more with some of these than others, and our awareness of them is the first step toward choosing a different path—one that leads to greater faith, connection, and purpose.
1. Doubt: Undermining Confidence and Trust
Doubt causes us to question God and His goodness, His plan, His wisdom, or even His Word. It weakens our convictions, leading us to feel inadequate, uncertain, or confused about why God has allowed certain experiences or struggles in our parenting journey.
❤️ At the heart of doubt is a lack of trust.
How Doubt Affects Parenting:
- Feeling unsure about discipline, boundaries, or decisions.
- Worrying excessively about your child’s future or faith.
- Questioning whether you are doing enough or getting it right.
How to Overcome Doubt:
✔️ Trust God’s guidance – Seek wisdom in Scripture and prayer (Proverbs 3:5-6).
✔️ Seek wise counsel – Lean on trusted mentors, therapists, or parenting resources.
✔️ Affirm your child’s identity – Speak life-giving words over them, reinforcing their worth in Christ.
2. Distraction: Losing Sight of What Truly Matters
Distraction shifts our focus away from what is most important and onto lesser things. It can come in the form of busyness, technology, emotional overwhelm, anticipating worst-case scenarios, or even focusing too much on accomplishments rather than connection.
❤️ At the heart of distraction is not making God and/or our children a priority.
How Distraction Affects Parenting:
- Prioritizing tasks over meaningful moments with your children.
- Letting screens and schedules replace intentional connection.
- Losing focus on your role as a spiritual leader in your home.
How to Overcome Distraction:
✔️ Be present – Set aside daily time for meaningful, undistracted interactions.
✔️ Prioritize family rhythms – Establish routines for connection (family meals, prayer, or devotion time).
✔️ Evaluate your commitments – Ask, “Is this helping or hindering my role as a parent?”
3. Discontent: Breeding Resentment and Comparison
Discontent creeps in when we feel dissatisfied, bitter, or resentful about our circumstances. It can show up in comparison to other parents, frustration over our child’s struggles, or resentment toward the hard parts of parenting.
❤️ At the heart of discontent is feeling that we deserve better.
How Discontent Affects Parenting:
- Comparing yourself to other parents and feeling “less than.”
- Wishing your child were different instead of accepting them as they are.
- Criticizing, complaining, or harboring resentment about parenting challenges.
How to Overcome Discontent:
✔️ Practice gratitude – Shift focus to what’s going well rather than what’s missing.
✔️ Embrace your unique family – Your parenting journey is yours, not anyone else’s.
✔️ Reframe challenges as growth opportunities – Hard moments refine both you and your child.
4. Discouragement: Weighing You Down with Weariness
Discouragement makes us feel let down, exhausted, or even hopeless. Parenting is hard, and the enemy wants us to believe our efforts don’t matter, that we’re failing, or that nothing will change.
❤️ At the heart of discouragement is a lack of hope, rest, or a sense of agency.
How Discouragement Affects Parenting:
- Feeling weary, overwhelmed, or emotionally drained.
- Believing that no matter what you do, things won’t improve.
- Letting negative thoughts define your parenting approach.
How to Overcome Discouragement:
✔️ Refuel spiritually – Spend time in God’s Word for perspective and strength.
✔️ Celebrate small wins – Focus on progress, not perfection.
✔️ Lean on support – Parenting is not meant to be done alone. Find mentors or a community.
5. Discounting: Minimizing Problems, Feelings, and Relationships
Discounting happens when we minimize or disregard things that truly matter—whether it’s our child’s struggles, our own emotions, or our need for connection. The enemy tempts us to brush things off rather than address them head-on.
❤️ At the heart of discounting is downplaying something that is of value.
How Discounting Affects Parenting:
- Ignoring family struggles rather than addressing them.
- Brushing off children’s emotions as “not a big deal.”
- Withdrawing emotionally instead of engaging relationally.
How to Overcome Discounting:
✔️ Validate emotions – Teach your child that their feelings matter, even if you don’t fully understand them.
✔️ Address problems head-on – Avoidance only makes issues worse over time.
✔️ Commit to engagement – Even when it’s hard, be emotionally present for your child.
Final Encouragement: Choosing a Different Path
Now that we’ve explored these strategies, take a moment to reflect:
➡️ How do these devices directly impact your parenting?
➡️ How do they indirectly affect your kids through your relationships—with your spouse, other caregivers, God, or yourself?
The good news is, awareness (coupled with the Holy Spirit) leads to transformation. The enemy’s tactics lose power when we recognize them and choose to parent with faith, intentionality, and grace.
- Doubt is defeated when we trust God’s plan.
- Distraction is overcome by being present and intentional.
- Discontent loses its power when we choose gratitude and acceptance.
- Discouragement fades when we focus on hope and progress.
- Discounting is replaced by intentional connection and emotional engagement.
If you’ve seen these patterns in your parenting, it simply means you are human. We all struggle in different ways, but awareness is the first step toward transformation. I encourage you to bring these patterns into the light—share with a trusted friend, mentor, or spouse. The enemy’s tactics lose their power when we invite Jesus’ love and redemption into our parenting.
This doesn’t mean the journey will always be easy. But you are not alone. God’s grace is enough. His wisdom equips you for the road ahead. His presence offers the love and acceptance you need to keep moving forward and to keep loving your children.
Although the enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy, Jesus brings freedom and abundance. He desires that we have life to the FULL (John 10:10). If you ask Him to reveal the lies you’ve believed or the ways you’ve fallen into the enemy’s traps, He will open your eyes. If you seek transformation, He is faithful to bring it. As you draw near to Him, He will guide you, strengthen you, and renew your heart.
We all fall short—whether through discouragement, discontent, distraction, or doubt. We are imperfect parents, raising imperfect children. But we have a Perfect Parent who loves us perfectly. May that truth bring you peace, encouragement, and hope as you navigate the twists and turns of parenting.
Would you like support in recognizing and overcoming these patterns? I’d love to walk alongside you.
📅 Schedule a FREE 15-minute Connection Call to explore how Attachment-Focused Parenting and Enneagram Coaching can bring clarity and hope to your parenting journey.
For more encouragement and parenting insights, sign up for my email newsletter here!
*The Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV). (2011). Biblica, Inc. (Original work published in 1978.)
**This blog was inspired by the Life Application® Bible, NIV (1991). Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. Wheaton, IL. that listed “Satan’s Plan” as “Doubt, Discouragement, Diversion, Defeat, and Delay” (pg. 13) and was expanded and applied to parenting by this author.
